TEDDY: "Oh man! This scene: the great Jurassic World controversy. See, I'm torn: On one hand, I am personally of the opinion Claire's character would be far more attractive if she'd put on a proper pair of sensible gorram shoe's already!"  ~  "But I can also appreciate how thoroughly BAD ASS she is sprinting through that final scene in fraking stilettos to effectively SAVE EVERYBODY, so if her fashionability is really that important to her, I can definitely respect that. Which is fine; we can agree to disagree, or whatever. What I want to know, is why no one is talking about the real issue:" ~ "--Hollywood's systematic refusal to portray women with POCKETS."

This is our time people! Let's end the double standards!.. Or whatever. Maybe I'm just tired of carting my sisters' stuff around for them...

Drastic Measures

TEDDY *donning a deep sea dive suit*: "I reckon mosquitoes must be one of the most evil forces on the planet."  ~  ":They're one of the few things with the power to make a grown man smack himself in the balls..."

I'm glad I was inspired by a camping trip this weekend to include the dive suit, 'cause I was a bit worried about ball humor being a bit out of character with my strip... To be fair though, it still hurts a bit if I think about it... 


TEDDY: "Thanks for hosting last night! Had a good time!"  ~ MARK: "Wow, dude. It's like 2:30. Did you just wake up?"  ~ TEDDY: "No, I've been up for a while. It's just taken me this long to be emotionally up to being awake..."

Yet Another Why Men Shouldn't Cook

ALLISON: "GAH! Socks!..Wet...Floor!.."     TEDDY: "Oh, yeah. Sorry, I should have warned you I was cooking... Basically, just consider this whole room a SPLASH ZONE...

Of course, I think it's pretty clear at this point with this series, when I say "men" I mean "me"... 


ALLISON: "Well, well. Look who's perfected their impersonation of a couch cushion. Did you at least get anything accomplished today?" TEDDY *slouched in front of TV wearing PJ's*: "I managed to turn off the YOUTUBE videos I was binging in bed and come up here..."

"Well, ok: Full disclosure, I accidentally unplugged my laptop and didn't realize until the battery died, but also I got this idea for a T shirt I can wear around that says, like, 'PLEASE HIRE ME' with like a QR code to my resume or something, sooo...."